Work Woes

First of all, why is any default font Times New Roman?

Gross.

Secondly, I'm allowed to talk about it now, so let me explain why the last couple of months have been some of the most trying for me thus far.

Until the end of February I was working for a local fire protection company as an admin assistant/receptionist.

It's a small office, six ladies in total including myself, and things are said often in a small group of women that probably shouldn't be said. Racist jokes. Sexist jokes. Homophobic jokes. 

See, when I started there, I was told that the ladies were very open and quite vulgar, which I expected. Office ladies and the occasional technician, curses ran free.

I did my job quietly for almost a year, and the ladies were well aware of my home situation, that is - That I am in a stable monogamous relationship with another woman. We've been together for over two years, we don't have any drama.

I think that may have been the problem.

I don't talk about what happens at home with my coworkers because A) it's not their business, and B) it's still not their business.

I mean, you have to be level ten to unlock my tragic backstory, right?

I wish I could tell you that it wasn't my boss who made the homophobic jokes, but it was. 

One afternoon while I was wearing a dress (because what you're wearing clearly matters, kids) I offered to replace the big water canister on top of the cooler because my other coworker couldn't do it because she's pregnant.

Boss told me not to worry, that we could get one of the guys to do it later. I'm the office help, it's no trouble for me to do it. I'm not so weak that the water would take me down.

I said, with a joking tone, that we 'don't need a man to do it' and my boss told me to "stop being such a lesbian about it".

Let me clarify, because context is, though irrelevant, important for the story I guess. I'm pansexual. Women, men, everything in between, floats my boat. I love people of all kinds, and I'm not held back by gender when it comes to attraction.

That shouldn't affect how people treat me in the workplace.

Because I was so busy being blown away that she'd say such a thing, I let it slide. Replaced the water. The day carried on.

A little while later I heard rumor from a loyal coworker that I was going to be fired, that they were looking for my replacement. Why, is anyone's guess. I worked diligently and quietly. I asked appropriate questions, I was respectful, I got things done with efficiency. Really, I'm the dream admin assistant. I often wonder if it's because I did everything without drama that I was replaced. In a tiny office that thrives off of dramatic news, perhaps my 'boring' nature needed to be replaced. 

So, I did what anyone in my situation would do. I updated my resume, sent out feelers for new jobs, got a weekend reception job at a local hair salon where I'm still working. My new boss is gay, and one of my favorite people in the whole world. No issues with discrimination there. :D 

After two of the most stressful weeks of waiting, the day finally came when I was told that 'today is your last day', and that they were sorry but there wasn't much work they could give me anymore. True, because I worked quickly, and business was slow. There wasn't a lot they could give me to do.

Keep in mind that a job posting had called for a new admin assistant for this workplace and Boss and Accountant had been going out to interview people while we were all running the office. Searching for my replacement.

I packed up my desk, hugged my two coworkers who I actually had grown close to, and left that Thursday afternoon.

Friday morning I received a text about the new girl who had replaced me.

One of the coworkers texts me that Boss announces to the office after New Girl had filled out paperwork and left the office, "Don't worry girls, this one's not a lesbian."

Excuse me?!

Livid and sick with...I don't even know, righteous fury? I consulted with my girlfriend, my parents, the human rights tribunal of BC and a couple of close friends who'd been in similar discrimination situations and I was advised to open a complaint against Boss.

It was a long, complicated and arduous process. I was told by Loyal Coworker that Boss was freaking out when she got served with the notice of complaint. The fact that it had brought her so many emotions gave me joy. If I didn't stand up to her, who would?

Apparently the girl before me had been bisexual, and she'd been 'let go' too.

I was contacted by both Loyal Coworkers with words of praise, proud of me for standing up to Boss.

I was then told that they wouldn't stand up for me if the matter was taken to court.

Skip forward to a few weeks later, to about a week ago.

I contact my case manager who tells me that I have to provide evidence. The only evidence I have is from the word of my coworkers who were present for the 'stop being such a lesbian' comment, and text messages from Loyal Coworker who called, begging to know if I'd named her officially in the complaint against Boss.

No, of course I hadn't. I'm not a snitch.

Besides, why is job security suddenly more important than right versus wrong? Basic human rights? What happened to you being proud of me for standing up for myself?

And so I am faced with no one to back me up in court. Of my coworkers who told me they were proud of me for standing up to her, none of them will stand up for me.

Fighting a losing battle against a company, and a Boss who lost the little respect I had for her in the first place, I decided to drop my case.

I'm horrendously disappointed in my coworkers, and in this entire situation.

The only thing I can gain from this is the knowledge that those of you who knew about the situation while it was happening helped hold me up and kept me from despair and I thank each one of you eternally. You know who you are.

Molly has been my rock through this entire ordeal.

At the beginning of my fight when I was losing hope, she looked me in the face and asked me, "Honey. What would Anders do?" That may seem a little far-fetched to some of you, but it's been what I've clung to this entire time.

Anders fought. He didn't give up. Sure, I might have, but I shook the foundations and maybe now Boss will think twice before she opens her mouth.